December 25, 2012

Evolution of a Christmas tree


It’s been Christmas for several hours.  HAPPY CHRISTMAS.  But I haven’t got to bed yet so as far as I’m concerned it’s still Christmas Eve.*

Christmas tree at 6 pm Christmas Eve

Peter was doing extremely well.   I’d only got it out of Third House’s attic and brought it down to the mews at about 3:30.  And fed my assortment of creatures lunch [sic], bolted a few olives and yesterday’s brussels sprouts and hared off to ring bells at Forza for the crib service.    I came home via Third House again to get the rest of the stuff to, you know, decorate the tree.  There wasn’t room first run, with a car full of critters.

Stage Two.

Okay.  Tree’s up.  Now I wrap the stem/trunk/knobbly plastic central column with tinsel.  This hides the strange bare patches in real trees and the equally strange green tape used to hold fake trees together.  Also, I like tinsel.

Lotsa stuff. You want lotsa stuff to hang on your tree.

And yes, that’s dinner in a bowl on the right with chopsticks across it.

More stuff. Even more stuff.

And the next course of dinner on the table on the right.

Enough! It’s enough! I want to go to BED!


Between previous photo and this one there were three hurtles–one long hellhound and two short hellterror–plus midnight mass.   With lots more carols.  I’ve found that the answer to my ME-related inability to stand for very long is to sit in the back row and stand behind my chair and then lean on its back.  This frees up all those tight little anxiety cells so you can SING LOUDER.  During the passing-the-peace-around one of my neighbours said, I’m enjoying your singing.  –I’m not sure if this might be Britspeak for shut up, okay?  You’re bothering me.

Hellterror barricade.

The tree’s on a table this year in the fond belief that we can keep her off it.  But for the early everything-all-over-the-floor stages a lack of hellterror is critical.  That is in fact her crate on the left covered in an orange blanket (the green towel is covering the hole in the orange blanket).**  When she barks she gets her curtains closed.  She was barking at the thunder.  We’ve been having thunder, lightning, hail, and torrential rain.  Joy.  I keep reminding myself I’d rather have rain than snow–in a country where no one knows how to deal with snow–but I think less rain might be, you know, possible.   It would certainly be desirable.

Meanwhile I’m getting tired of climbing over the sofa.

And yes, of course I decorated the back of the tree too.

What kind of a cheesy scuzzball do you think I am?  I admit that if I didn’t have to have bells if there are bells to be had, I would bag the horrible little ropes of bells which TANGLE LIKE A !”£$%^&*(!!!!!!.  Which is why we don’t have lights.  Peter used to put the lights up and he hates lights . . . because of the whole untangling thing.  And I’m not going there.  I have enough things to melt down over.  Including, once a year, my two ropes of decorative mini-bells.

Our pair of Mythopoeic Fantasy Award lions made festive.

I haven’t finished draping the rest of the sitting room in tinsel yet.  TOMORROW.  I CAN DO IT TOMORROW.  I mean . . . later today.***


* * *

*All right, it’s Christmas and Christmas Eve.  I went to Midnight Mass–which is at 11:30–but the vicar said, yo, let me be the first to wish you Happy Christmas, as the big hand rolled past the twelve.  Which was still several hours ago.

** Behind the crate you can see a chair with presents on it.  Yes.  Other people get their presents wrapped before the last minute.  Before after the last minute.  Sigh.

*** It’s almost time for the monks’ morning prayer.  Hmmmm.  No, McKinley, get a grip, you have PRESENTS TO WRAP.  And you’ll enjoy the duck and champagne and mince pies and brandy butter more if you’ve had some sleep. . . .


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